Creationist Theorem Proof #37

An excerpt from my forthcoming book, “Ain’t That Just the Damnedest Thing…”, available in bookstores everywhere just as soon as I get my shit together.

Creationist Theorem #37

Creationism is the only viable way in which to explain the existence of the universe.

This can  be readily verified by the simple fact:


The laundry has never done itself.  If evolution were true we would have passed this stage in the evolutionary timeline by now.  So, in effect, evolution is vacant from time,  and since it took me time to write this and make a neat little picture for it,  we must live in a universe made of time.  A universe in which evolution cannot exist.

One Response to Creationist Theorem Proof #37

  1. mecanx says:

    Ok, so to “Evolve” means to:

    e·volve (-vlv)
    v. e·volved, e·volv·ing, e·volves
    a. To develop or achieve gradually: evolve a style of one’s own.
    b. To work (something) out; devise: “the schemes he evolved to line his purse” (S.J. Perelman).
    2. Biology To develop (a characteristic) by evolutionary processes.
    3. To give off; emit.
    1. To undergo gradual change; develop: an amateur acting group that evolved into a theatrical company.
    2. Biology To develop or arise through evolutionary processes.
    [Latin volvere, to unroll : -, ex-, ex- + volvere, to roll; see wel-2 in Indo-European roots.]

    Then that means with time and in time that pile of laundry would eventually become a different form.

    Just because they didn’t wash themselves doesn’t mean that they will never go back to the form in which they came, but in reality they would actually be a new form because of the blending of the dissolving matter that was created by someone or something else, thus creating a new form of matter…

    So technically because of “time” and “evolution” they “created” something absolutely new…thus proving that everything including evolution does exist… 😛

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